Of Beginnings and Beyond

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Just can't...

I am not being stubborn or hard headed but I am having a hard time accepting things just the way everybody wants me too. I am not being pressured nor push to accept things but I am happy just the way it is going right now.... crazy isn't it?!?!?!

I am keeping my distance and yet I find it hard to accept how things are. I know that in every decision we make we also pay for the consequences and for that I already paid them and I just can't still accept that this is how it is already and I know you also feel a little jealous when I am the first to know about this and that instead of you but honestly that is just fine with me.

That's why sometimes I know where I will be and step back just a couple of steps but a lot more so that they will see you.

Can you blame me? That sometimes it is still a big slap on my face seeing you with him and all happy while she is not and it was supposed to be just a deal of help. I know it has been years and decades has passed and I should learned to just accept what is now and face the future, right?

But honestly part of me accepts it already and the other is just can't. Well, at least I tried and each day I will keep on trying until I can but for now, let us just leave it the way it is...

At least respect is still there but sorry I just can't.......

Posted By:CarmelaSolon @ 11:30 AM

3Your Thoughts:

Anonymous Luiza berkata...

Honestly, I can't blame you sometimes it's just really hard to accept the facts and how things are now. Maybe when the right time comes you will just go with the flow..

11:55 AM  
Blogger Mig berkata...

It's OK, Carmela! You are wonderful just as you are. You do not need to accept things as others want you to. You need to respect them. That's it.

I feel this entry if your as a personal message to another woman. That sometimes it is still a big slap on my face seeing you with him and all happy while she is not... Am I wrong? I don't know the story behind this "just can't" but I'm with you. There were times in my life when I just couldn't. And even now there are things I just can't.

But let me ask you a question: if you cannot accept things as they are, what are you going to do to change them? For as long as you do nothing, like it or not, you "accept".

3:06 PM  
Anonymous Carmela berkata...

Hi Mig,

Thanks for the great comment. I somehow thought that I might be being selfish about what I am feeling.

"What are you going to do to change them?" Actually there is nothing to change but rather accepting it with open heart that what had started to be a "help deal", turn out to be lifetime commitment.

3:51 PM  

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